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Achieving Balance Between Work and FamilyThe Challenge
Making a Plan and Getting Organized
A. PLANNING
Planning allows you to take charge of your life by setting goals, making
choices, compromising, prioritizing and being prepared for the unexpected.
Here are the six steps involved in planning
- Assess Your Situation
Ask yourself: Am I being realistic about my expectations and what I
can accomplish? Am I feeling too much pressure? What specific things
about my life are overwhelming me?
- Establish Goals
Goals are what you strive to attain. They are important because they
help you focus your time and energy.
Goals should be:
- Realistic
- Specific
- Measureble
- Compatible with your lifestyle
- Reflective of your values
- Written
Example: "By next month I want my family to share more of the responsibillities
and tasks at home." Check it against the qualities of the goals:
- Realistic? Yes. All family members, including small children,
have the capability of helping around the house.
- Specific? Yes. Each family member can be assigned specific tasks
for which he/she is responsible.
- Measurable? Yes. After a period of time we can monitor and assess
what each family member achieves.
- Compatible with lifestyle? Yes. All family members are busy but
each person can set aside the designated amount of time to do the
chores.
- Reflective of your values? Yes. In my value system, it's important
for everyone in the family to participate in maintaining the household.
- Written? Yes. We have a list of chores with names of people responsible
and dates when the tasks need to be completed.
Setting Goals
List your goals for each major area of your life (Examples: Work,
Family, Personal, Leisure, Financial). These are your "ideals"
- what you would like to achieve. You might want to write your
goals down in pencil, and rework them according to the qualities
outlined above. |
- Determine Priorities for Your Goals
Prioritizing
Your Goals
Look at your list of goals in each category.
- Decide which goals are most important for you at this time.
- Number your goals in order of importance.
The most important priorities are the "must do's".
Lesser goals are ones that are important but don't have to be
achieved right now. Let go of items that can wait.
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- Create an Action Plan
An action plan includes the steps you
need to take to reach your goal. For example, your goal is: "By next
month I want my family to share more of the responsibilities and tasks
at home." Your action plan might include the following:
- Call a family meeting for the purpose of explaining your need/goal.
- As a family, list the chores that need to be done weekly.
- Assign the chores (let people choose what they'd like to do and
rotate the unpleasant chores).
- Include a training session to teach your children or other family
members how to accomplish the task.
- Write down the chores and name of the person responsible and
time/date for the chore to be done.
Creating
an Action Plan
Look at your list of goals in each category.
- For each category, create several "I will" statements.
- Put a target date for completion next to each goal.
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- Make Choices About How to Reach Established Goals
and Priorities
When you're planning your day, ask yourself "Will
this activity get me closer to my goal?" Make your decisions accordingly!
- Make a Back-Up Plan for the Unexpected
Anticipate crisis. Be prepared for problems and have
a back-up plan to solve them. When the unexpected arises, you can
use your time and energy to activate your back-up plan. You won't
have to think or worry about what you need to do - you'll already
know.
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Creating a Back-Up Plan
The following situations can present problems
for working parents and working caregivers of the elderly. Read
each one to see if it pertains to your life. If it does, write
down a back-up plan.
- My child wakes up sick.
- My child gets sick at day care or school while I'm at work.
- Unexpected company comes to my house at dinner time.
- My car breaks down.
- I have to work late.
- My elderly parent gets sick.
- My provider can't take care of my child/elderly relative.
- I have to go out of town for work.
- My child is in a school performance and I am not able to attend.
- My child loses the house key and can't get into the house
after school.
- Others:
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B. ORGANIZING
Getting organizing may be easier said than done, but being organized
helps save precious time and energy - the two commodities we seem to
have the least of.
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Tips For Getting Organized
- Make a prioritized "to do" list for home and work each day.
- Use a large family calendar to list all family members' activities
and schedules for the week. Post it in the kitchen for all to
see and use.
- Consolidate errands and household tasks instead of making
small frequent trips. For example, drop off shoes to be repaired
on the way to the cleaners and grocery store.
- Combine activities to satisfy your varied needs. For example,
take a regular brisk walk with a friend whom you wouldn't ordinarily
see. You'll be strengthening your body as well as an important
friendship.
- Cook in large quantities and freeze separate meals.
- Order clothing, gifts, and household items from catalogues
or on-line.
- Develop a system to ease transition times between work and
home.
- Organize items that are needed when you leave the house
each morning. Some people designate a different corner of
the kitchen for each child's belongings. In the evening they
place the items that the children will need for the next day
in the designated space. Leave your briefcase, purse, coat,
etc. by the door.
- Give yourself enough time to shift from one role to another.
This might mean getting up ten minutes earlier so you won't
feel the need to rush.
- Focus on one role and one activity at a time. When you are
home, try not to think about your job and vice versa. Energy
is wasted when you are doing one thing but your thoughts are
elsewhere.
- When you come home from work, change out of your work clothes
and put on your at-home clothes to help you move into your
parenting role.
- Establish daily and weekly routines - for shopping, cooking,
cleaning, doing laundry - that all family members can rely on.
These routines should not be rigid, but they should provide
a comfortable pattern for getting things done. When everyone
knows the family routine, there are no surprises that can cause
problems. Having a sense of what is done and when it's done
reduces tension, and allows people to anticipate and prepare
for changes.
- Saturday morning the family spends one hour cleaning and
organizing the house.
- Friday night meal is pizza or other take-out food.
- Saturday afternoon Dad plays basketball. Sunday afternoon
Mom has her "free" time.
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